Keywords:

Autdar – awareness and ability to recognise other autistics

AAC – alternative and augmentative communication , any means of communication other than mouth words (speech)

DEP – Double Empathy Problem

Stimming – repeating movements or sounds that all humans engage in e.g. singing, dancing, spinning, watching rain fall. We as autistic people often stim in more notable ways as we consciously take in more information.

As an autistic person, I have always been aware of my fellow neurokin. More than aware, acutely aware, a magnetic visceral connection pulling me towards my community. Even as a young child at primary school (unaware of my neurotype) my ‘autdar’ (was very strong and accurate), I instinctively felt the need to be near other autistic children. This makes sense being amongst our own community is integral to feelings of safety, belonging and happiness. But is it time to move beyond awareness?

After all, I have known that I am autistic for quite a few years, and it’s not awareness that has helped me but rather genuine interest in exploring my own autistic experiences and also (not to be underestimated) understanding and acceptance from others. Fellow autistic readers, you may be thinking ‘well understanding doesn’t come without awareness.’ Yes, you are absolutely right, knowledge is power! To be honest, my interest in autistic experiences and our community would not have evolved without my early awareness of being different to other people. So I am grateful for and understand the importance of awareness!

Even so awareness campaigns about our very existence (particularly in April) make me very uncomfortable and I know that many members of the autistic spaces that I am involved in feel similarly. Autistics, how do awareness campaigns make you feel? (No pressure to answer!) 

True acknowledgement and understanding of needs, strengths and experiences takes time, there is no (metaphorical) finish line when it comes to exploring your autistic profile.

Some of you reading may have realised that you are autistic very recently and therefore may not be ready to deep dive into your experiences. That’s ok too! Do whatever is right for you. The autistic community is waiting for you with open arms if and when you want to join though – (don’t worry, no unexpected hugs!)

Exploring Your Autistic Profile

Being autistic means we have our own unique neurotype – we are neurodivergent! Trying to explain being autistic to others who don’t know much is hard – when asked the question ‘what does being autistic mean for me?’ I think that it’s like asking ‘what does it mean to be human?’ This is a great example of one of my key autistic strengths – I am analytical and crave depth in everything I do.

Below I will explore some key aspects of being autistic to help you reflect on your own needs and strengths:

Communication Style

Important – communication is always two way! If, you ever feel like a misunderstanding is your fault please remember the overriding message from The Double Empathy Problem by autistic academic Dr Damian Milton. Proposed by Milton in 2012, The Double Empathy Problem articulates what is a simple fact that people with very different experiences of the world will find it difficult to relate to and understand one another. To be more specific, non autistic people find it difficult to empathise with us as autistic people as our lived experiences are quite distinct. A mismatch in understanding and communication often occurs because of our differing neurotypes. Sound familiar? Well’s that’s because the DEP is one of the first autistic derived theories and is based on understanding our experiences as a cultural difference. 

When you travel to a foreign country, and you try to get integrate with locals using merely facial expressions and gestures – something often gets lost in translation! This analogy is exactly what the DEP outlines and puts in practice –  miscommunication and general understanding is not the sole responsibility of us as autistic people but that of non-autistic people too. If this is the first time you have read about the DEP, I hope it is validating or enlightening and encourages you to be kind to yourself. 

The way you communicate is beautiful, even if it doesn’t feel it like it yet!

We all communicate in our own autistic way, whether that’s an eagerness to infodump at any given opportunity (me!), a preference and natural affinity for the written word or using an AAC device (amongst other methods) we all deserve to have our needs met.

Do you often need to ask for clarification in conversation?

Do you often need more time to compose your thoughts or sentences?

Do you thrive on interest based conversations?

I hope these questions inspire some thoughts about the way you communicate.

Sensory Experiences

Everything is a sensory experience! Of course you may be thinking, we can’t interact with the world without our sensory organs. As autistic people we are often very sensitive beings, including to the feelings of people around us.

Do you pick up on the emotions of others really quickly? 

 Throughout your life, you may have only known about 5 senses – well actually there are 8. Alongside the 5 most obvious,  I think the 3 others proprioception (body awareness)  interoception (internal state of your body e.g. pain, emotions, body temperature, hunger, needing the toilet etc)  and vestibular (balance)  are fundamental to understanding your nervous system and meeting your autistic needs.

 Often when our sensory experiences are described by non autistic people they are talked about in the context of distress – e.g. needing to leave the supermarket because of sensory overload. Whilst this example may resonate with some of you there is autistic joy to be found in the sensory world too! (More on sensory joy later!)

Needless to say,  if you experience sensory overwhelm regularly, I get it I’ve been there too! But thankfully, the majority of the time I am now in an environment that suits my needs.

For those of you who don’t yet have access to such a space, here are some prompts to get you thinking about your sensory needs:

Does sitting still feel unnatural or uncomfortable etc?

What would your ideal space look and feel like? (Is it possible to incorporate some of these elements in an environment that currently overwhelms you?)

Do you crave deep pressure or feel pain when lightly touched?

What does stimming feel like?

These questions barely scratch the surface when it comes to exploring your own sensory profile, but I hope they are useful! Our community is so beautifully diverse that it’s impossible to account for the full variety of our experiences with just 4 mere questions!

Sensory Joy

I have always felt immensely connected to the world in a way that I just can’t quite convey to non-autistic people – it’s beautifully intense. One of the ways I experience sensory joy is by listening to the same song on repeat or repeating sounds or words – stimming is integral to our culture.

What does joyful stimming look and feel like for you?

Are fidgets/stim tools important to you? 

Come back for part 2, where you can learn more about your autistic profile including how being monotropic shapes everything we do! Just so you are fully prepared (and know exactly what to expect) other experiences that are explored in part 2 include dedicated interests and executive functioning skills.

References

Double empathy problem – https://reframingautism.org.au/miltons-double-empathy-problem-a-summary-for-non-academics/