A CREDO FOR SUPPORT
Do Not see my disability as the problem. Recognize that my disability is an attribute.
Do Not see my disability as a deficit.
It is you who see me as deviant and helpless.
Do Not try to fix me because I am not broken.
Support me. I can make my contribution to the communityWhat I have always been hoping to accomplish is the creation of community.Community is magic. Community is power. Community is resistance.Disability Visibility: First-Person Stories from the Twenty-First Century https://www.amazon.com/Disability-Visibility-First-Person-Stories-Twenty-First-ebook/dp/B082ZQBL98/ https://www.amazon.com/Disability-Visibility-Adapted-Young-Adults-ebook/dp/B08VFT4R9T/… More in my way.
Do Not see me as your client. I am your fellow citizen.
See me as your neighbour. Remember, none of us can be self-sufficient.
Do Not try to modify my behaviour.
Be still & listen. What you define as inappropriate
may be my attempt to communicate with you in the only way I can.
Do Not try to change me, you have no right. Help me learn what I want to know.
Do Not hide your uncertainity behind “professional” distance. Be a person who listens, and does not take my struggle away from me by trying to make it all better.
Do Not use theories and strategies on me.
Be with me. And when we struggle
with each other, let that give rise to self-reflection.
Do Not try to control me. I have a right to my powerThe 20th Century political scientist Karl Deutsch said, “Power is the ability not to have to learn.”I quote this statement often, because I think it’s one of the most important… More as a person. What you call non-complianceNoncompliance is a social skill.Noncompliance is one of the most important social skills. Noncompliance skills make it possible to say no, even when others want your right to say no to… More or manipulation may actually be the only way I can exert some control over my life.
Do Not teach me to be obedient, submissive, and polite. I need to feel entitled to say No if I am to protect myself.
Do Not be charitable towards me.
The last thing the world needs is another Jerry Lewis.
Be my ally against those who exploit me for their own gratification.
Do Not try to be my friend. I deserve more than that. Get to know me. We may become friends.
Do Not help me, even it it does make you feel good.
Ask me if I need your help. Let me show you how you can best assist me.
Do not admire me. A desire to live a full life does not warrant adoration. Respect me, for respect presumes equityEquityA commitment to action: the process of redistributing access and opportunity to be fair and just.A way of being: the state of being free of bias, discrimination, and identity-predictable outcomes… More.
Do Not tell, correct, and lead. Listen, Support, and Follow.
Do Not work on me. Work with me.A Credo for Support
This credo is a beautiful recipe for respecting autonomySelf-determination Theory (SDT) is… — a model, a macro theory, of human motivation. It’s one of several models of human motivation, but it’s one that has been confirmed over and… More in a framework of interdependenceInterdependence acknowledges that our survival is bound up together, that we are interconnected and what you do impacts others. If this pandemic has done nothing else, it has illuminated how… More and careThe activities that constitute care are crucial for human life. We defined care in this way: Care is “a species activity that includes everything that we do to maintain, continue,… More.
The late Herb Lovett used to say that there are only two problems with “special education” in America: It’s not special and it sure as hell isn’t education. The field continues to be marinated in behavioristUltimately behaviorism provides a simplistic lens that can’t see beyond itself.Why is the doctrine of behaviorism still being used, at all?How can ABA be the gold-standard for autism when it… More assumptions and practices despite the fact that numerous resources for teachers, therapists, and parents offer alternatives to behavior control. These alternatives are based on a commitment to care and to understand. By “care,” I mean that our relationship with the child is what matters most. He or she is not a passive object to be manipulated but a subject, a center of experience, a person with agency, with needs and rights. And by “understand,” I mean that we have an obligation to look beneath the behavior, in part by imaginatively trying to adopt that person’s point of view, attempting to understand the whys rather than just tabulating the frequency of the whats. As NormNormal was created, not discovered, by flawed, eccentric, self-interested, racist, ableist, homophobic, sexist humans. Normal is a statistical fiction, nothing less. Knowing this is the first step toward reclaiming your… More Kunc and Emma Van der Klift urged us in their Credo for Support: “Be still and listen. What you define as inappropriate may be my attempt to communicate with you in the only way I can….[or] the only way I can exert some control over my life….Do not work on me. Work with me.”Autism and Behaviorism – Alfie Kohn
Further readingThere are three types of reading: eye reading, ear reading, and finger reading.The Dyslexia Empowerment Plan: A Blueprint for Renewing Your Child’s Confidence and Love of Learning Most schools and… More,
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