The Benevolence of Surrender: Connected, Trusting Relationships

I’m rewatching The Benevolence of Surrender, reflecting on Swamburger’s words:

Let’s make it personal.

You have to know the person, and that person has to believe in you.

Swamburger

Here are related quotes on autisticAutistic ways of being are human neurological variants that can not be understood without the social model of disability.If you are wondering whether you are Autistic, spend time amongst Autistic people, online and offline.  If... More ways of developing trustAutists conceptualise the world in terms of trusted relationships with unique people.The beauty of collaboration at human scale The Autistic way of developing trust is based on experienced domain-specific competence.... More:

Autists conceptualise the world in terms of trustedAutists conceptualise the world in terms of trusted relationships with unique people.The beauty of collaboration at human scale The Autistic way of developing trust is based on experienced domain-specific competence.... More relationships with unique people…

Source: The beauty of collaboration at human scale

…many autistic children reported flourishing at home both educationally and personally. For these children and families, we identified three key ingredients essential to this flourishing, including: (i) the importance of connected, trustingAutists conceptualise the world in terms of trusted relationships with unique people.The beauty of collaboration at human scale The Autistic way of developing trust is based on experienced domain-specific competence.... More relationships (‘people’); (ii) the sensory and social safety of home (‘place’); and (iii) the flexibility to pace and structure learning to suit the individual child (‘time’).

Source: “It just fits my needs better”: Autistic students and parents’ experiences of learning from home during the early phase of the COVID-19 pandemic

The Autistic way of developing trust is based on experienced domain-specific competence. Autistic people:

(when young) assume everyone is telling the truthJustice, equality, fairness, mercy, longsuffering, Work, Passion, knowledge, and above all else, Truth. Those are my primary emotions.Very Grand Emotions: How Autistics and Neurotypicals Experience Emotions Differently » NeuroClastic https://youtu.be/uPRa6G2a48E... More;

(when older) can become very cynical;

can be fooled by people who appear to be logical but who have no scruples fabricating evidence;

are slow in learning the cultural significance of social cues, and can’t reliably read social cues in an environment of sensory overload.

A common Autistic way of making friends

To construct trusted relationships and friendships, Autistic people apply an explicit goal oriented approach:

1. Search for people with shared interests, usually online
2. Confirm a shared area of interest
3. Start having fun by openly sharing knowledge, personal experiences, and related gaps of knowledge and questions
4. Explore what can be achieved with joint capabilities and capacities
5. Embark on significant joint projects (examples) to have more fun

Source: A communal definition of Autistic ways of being | Autistic Collaboration

Mutual trust. Connected, trusting relationships. That’s how I operate. I default to trust. That need and tendency is wired in deeply.

It might seem naïve, but then again it’s just really honest.

Solillaquists of Sound – The Benevolence of Surrender

Solillaquists of Sound build communityWhat I have always been hoping to accomplish is the creation of community.Community is magic. Community is power. Community is resistance.Disability Visibility: First-Person Stories from the Twenty-First Century https://www.amazon.com/Disability-Visibility-First-Person-Stories-Twenty-First-ebook/dp/B082ZQBL98/ https://www.amazon.com/Disability-Visibility-Adapted-Young-Adults-ebook/dp/B08VFT4R9T/... More and culture. They’re an inspiration to StimpunksStimpunk combines “stimming” + “punk” to evoke open and proud stimming, resistance to neurotypicalization, and the DIY culture of punk, disabled, and neurodivergent communities. Instead of hiding our stims, we... More.

The Listener’s Trilogy

Through 3 carefully crafted albums released over the last decade, the Solillaquists create a world of artThe arts are not a way to make a living. They are a very human way of making life more bearable. Practicing an art, no matter how well or badly,... More, music, & philosophy to immerse the listener in and reveal the powerThe 20th Century political scientist Karl Deutsch said, “Power is the ability not to have to learn.”I quote this statement often, because I think it’s one of the most important... More they themselves hold.

Solillaquists of Sound – Second Subject